NAME

SYNOPSIS

    use Dev::Bollocks;

    print Dev::Bollocks->new(),"\n";    # create first bollox
    print Dev::Bollocks->rand(),"\n";   # create random bollox
    print Dev::Bollocks::rand(3),"\n";  # create random bollox w/ 3 words

    $x = Dev::Bollocks->rand(),"\n";    # create some random bollox
    for ($i = 0; $i ++; $i < 10)
      {
      print "$x\n"; $x++;               # next bollox
      }

REQUIRES

EXPORTS

DESCRIPTION

Of course, to follow the spirit outlined in <http://www.fatsquirrel.org/veghead/software/bollocks/> this module doesn't simple do a "head /dev/bollocks", that would be too easy, too fast and non-portable. And bullshit is universilly portable.

Thus the module makes a subclass of Math::String and changes the default charset to a charset that somewhat emulates and extends the original /dev/bollocks charset.

As a side-effect you can calculate with bollocks strings, or even compare them to find out which is greater crap than the other:

        use Dev::Bollocks;

        my $x = Dev::Bollocks->rand();
        my $y = Dev::Bollocks->rand();

        print "$x is more crap than $y\n" if ($x > $y);
        print "$y is more crap than $x\n" if ($y > $x);
        print "$x is the same bollox than $y\n" unless ($y != $x);

EXAMPLES

 We were told to adaptively monetize holistic market-driven systems.
 It is important to appropriately fashion meta-services.
 We can enthusiastically utilize proactive channels.
 We should paradigmatically streamline e-services.
 Your job is to seamlessly architect dynamic out-of-the-box clusters.
 Our job is to interactively harness high-yield 24/7 markets.
 We were told to widespreadedly supply holistic synergies.
 So, let's assertively grow front-end vertical architectures.
 Your job is to completely exploit scalable meta-services.
 All of us plan to evangelistically empower low-risk edge-of-your-seat content.
 So, let's augmentatively build back-end systems.
 And next we simultaneously transform sexy m-commerce.
 All of us plan to continually benchmark world-class methodologies.
 Your job is to enormously disseminate open-source interactive mindshares.
 So, let's simultaneously transform interfaces.
 Our job is to confidentially coordinate intuitive intuitive e-commerce.
 It is important to paradigmatically embrace robust dot-com solutions.
 And next we appropriately innovate strategic customers.
 All of us plan to challengingly target synergies.
 Our job is to conveniently generate collaborative deliverables.
 It is important to evangelistically synergize high-yield robust IPOs.
 We should competently e-enable convergence.
 All of us plan to economically negotiate action-items.
 It is important to competently integrate value-added efficient users.
 We better widespreadedly promote vertical strategic materials.
 And next we centrally harness convergence.
 So, let's dynamically e-enable out-of-the-box 24/365 customers.
 And next we dramatically enhance efficient development.
 We better biannually enable high-yield metrics.

INTERNAL DETAILS

USEFULL METHODS

            $bollocks = Dev::Bollock->new();

            $bollocks = Dev::Bollock->rand($words);

            $bollocks->first($length);
            $bollocks = Dev::Bollocks->first($length);

            $bollocks->last($length);
            $bollocks = Dev::Bollocks->last($length);

            $bollocks->as_number();

            $bollocks->length();

            $bollocks->charset();

PERFORMANCE

PLANS

LICENSE

CREDITS

• The original idea is from <http://www.fatsquirrel.org/veghead/software/bollocks/>.
• I also found some words by searching the web for "Vision" statements (<http://www.google.com> is your friend!).
• Webster's dictionary. Nowhere you can find gems like autoschediastically, daffydowndilly or histomorphologically.
• And then there is <http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/career/html/mission_vocab.html>.
• From <http://www.tomshardware.com/cpu/01q4/011105/index.html>:

  "This time, AMD attempts to entrench its position in the performance-oriented high-end segment." - You just can't make that stuff up.

• <http://www.utsglobal.com/products.html>:

  ...provide enterprise-class UNIX operating environments... ...matched the unique scaleable, mission-critical features...

• The journal Displays Europe, issue #1 provided lot's of, uh, well, genuine [mental note to self: add genuine to the list of adjectives] material:

AUTHOR

(c) Tels http://bloodgate.com 2001 - 2006.